Revised Poem due 12/13/2012

Original

A Second Family

We all show up together, to the cool, loud and

compact studio rink, for a harmless game.

We chirp each other, with no hard feelings.

Our heartless jokes are our form of heartfull compliments.

We all cram in the small, smelly locker room together,

When a parent brings us all refreshing Gatorades and energizing

Sandwiches. We sit there for hours, we let the game we all

commonly love bring us together, and spend

 the wonderful thanksgiving together.

Revised

A Second Family

We all show up together, to the cool, loud, and

Compact studio rink, and lace up for a harmless game.

Our heartless chirps are hurtful compliments

With no hard feelings.

We all get together and just play.

We all cram in the small, smelly locker room together,

Tired and exhausted, but we still stay there together for hours.

The game we commonly love bring us all together, and we have

A wonderful Thanksgiving together.

Poem to Submit to IBID

Jack Reich

The Goose

On a cool, damp, cloudy

Day, the golden sun peaks

Out of the grey sky,

Spreading warmth along

The Earth’s surface,

Lighting the lifeless world.

Leaves swirl in the wind, as

Tree branches sway back and

Forth, and the soft, warm breeze

Blows ripples across the

Pond, as an acorn drops

Down from a tall oak tree.

A squirrel darts across the

Lawn, to grab the acorn,

And takes it back to his

Nest. And a bumble bee

Bounces from flower to

Flower, feeding on their nectar.

Birds chirp, while two students

Laugh as they peacefully

Walk to class. Small ducklings

Tail their mother across

The wet marsh by the pond,

While a frog hops around.

All until a goose let

Out a loud ugly honk,

Ruining the harmony

The sun delivered.

Thanksgiving Journal

Digging deeper into the roots of past struggles, experiences, and connections.

1.       Most of my newer poems seem to look deeper into what the topic is. I try to talk about something, and show the topics significance and/or meaning to me. I attempt to show why a topic is significant to me through explaining an experience, struggle, or connection.

2.       Earlier in the year, my poems would be a lot blander, and I would not put much significance or connection to my life. For example if I were to write this poem earlier in the year, I would have just written about what we did together, I would not have attempted to show how I see my teammates as a second family.

A Second Family

We all show up together, to the cool, loud and

compact studio rink, for a harmless game.

We chirp each other, with no hard feelings.

Our heartless jokes are our form of heartfull compliments.

We all cram in the small, smelly locker room together,

When a parent brings us all refreshing Gatorades and energizing

Sandwiches. We sit there for hours, we let the game we all

commonly love bring us together, and spend

 the wonderful thanksgiving together.